E-Mail This Story

Contact:
Nancy Solomon
Phone: 314.977.8017
solomonn@slu.edu

June 15, 2004

ST. LOUIS -- Randall Flanery doesn't need Father's Day to remind him how important dad is.

"There's no substitute for a father's presence," says the associate professor of community and family medicine at Saint Louis University and a father of 10. "The benefits to children are really there to having Dad around."

Studies show that the risk of juvenile delinquency, substance abuse, sexual abuse, early pregnancy and dropping out of high school is six times higher for children whose biological fathers are not part of their lives, Flanery says.

"Some of the most effective parenting comes when you can't plan for it," says Flanery, who is a pediatric psychologist at Saint Louis Behavioral Medicine Institute. "What if the phone rings at 12:30 on a weekend night and no one is there to pick it up?"

Young children may look at the absence of their father as personal rejection. "They see not having Dad around as proof that there's something wrong with them. And even in families that have a dad, it's more important for Dad to be at the weekly soccer games than for him to be working late so the family can afford a fancy vacation every two years. Luxuries aren't really what a kid needs and wants."

Teens Need Dads

Dads become more critical during adolescence.

"Generally, fathers are better at setting limits with teenage boys. I've seen it in my practice. Teenage boys who are on the brink of losing control calm down quite a bit by having their dads show up. It can keep things from escalating further."

Fathers may be even more important to the healthy development of their teenage daughters, Flanery adds.

Girls are more likely than boys to become depressed after puberty. Frequently those feelings are linked to estrangement from their fathers, Flanery says.

"They're looking to Dad to give them a clue about guys. But they miss out if Dad isn't there. In addition, the quality of the relationship between a teenage daughter and her father is predictive of the quality of a committed relationship she will have in her young adult years."

Flanery, whose children range in age from 7 to 27, believes being a dad is one of the hardest things a man can do.

"Putting yourself in the field to play is infinitely more worthwhile than not doing it all," he says. "Just being there is often the best you can do and truly that's plenty."

###