The 7 Squirrels You'll Meet in College
Don't worry about the people you'll meet in college; they'll probably be great. It's the squirrels you should fear.
By SLU Staff Writers
There are red squirrels, gray squirrels, even flying squirrels on Wikipedia. We'd propose another category: College squirrel.
Tiny, tough and used to the noise and chaos of students, College Squirrel fears nothing and eats everything. Here's a list of the odd — and sometimes creepy — variations you might spot on campus.
7. That squirrel who somehow ended up outside your 7th floor window.
Joke's on him. It doesn't even open. Photo credit.
6. The squirrel your friend swears they saw pulling an entire piece of pizza across campus - but can provide no photographic proof.
May or may not be related to Pizza Rat. Video by Rachel Martin.
5. The squirrel who darts in front of your car.
Then runs left, right and returns to center in some sort of suicidal fugue state.
4. That squirrel who keeps staring at you.
You know the one. Photo by Wendy Hamstra-Smith.
3. The squirrel who leaps out of the same trash can at you every day at 4:15 p.m.
Every day, you'll scream.
2. That one squirrel who is always chasing some other squirrel around campus.
Considerable crossover with No. 5.
1. The squirrel who lacks personal boundaries.
Video by Jennifer Mathews
It seems like she kind of, almost might let you touch her then runs away at the last minute.*
*Please do not touch the squirrels.
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